THE CPR of Discipline... and Bob Ross

When I meet someone and they ask, "What do you do?" I usually say I'm a middle school teacher.  That usually draws some interesting looks.  When they ask what subjects and I say "math, science, and reading" that draws even more looks. 

• Wow. you must have the patience of a saint. 
• I could never do that.  Those kids are so rude!
• Really? Kids that age are so bratty/spoiled/undisciplined/etc.

I understand that most people don't choose to spend their time with a couple dozen early-teenage adolescents on a daily basis.  They don't see their passion to want to know why, their questioning nature, the beauty of their squirrel-like attention.  Each day each student can have one of five different personalities show up, and I love that.

Discipline seems to be the one thing on most people's minds when I mention my profession.   People also ask, "how do you control so many kids in such a small space?"  This quote guides many of my philosophies regarding discipline:

Students do not come to school looking to get in trouble. They don't wake up, get dressed, then think about, "hmmm, how will I get myself in trouble today? Maybe I'll just shout some curse words during math class. That sounds good!"

Students come to school and are asked to do things that are extremely uncomfortable and not intrinsic to them. Each day they are asked to sit through multiple subjects of content, most of which they have never seen or heard about before.  They are asked to learn facts, do homework, and take tests in subjects they may not enjoy... And they are asked to do it by someone who may think that their class is the MOST IMPORTANT CLASS EVER.

It is so important to remember perspective.  The student that just called out or yelled at you or grumbled under her voice or threw a pencil across a room did it for a reason.  It is important that teachers look at that situation as "this student is struggling now... how can I help?" and stay away from, "that student is misbehaving, how can I punish her into submission? MUHAHAHA!"

My discipline style is similar to the steps of CPR.  The first part of CPR is making sure "the scene safe."  With discipline I ask a similar question - are any students (including the one in question) in any immediate physical or emotional danger?  Can I handle this in the classroom or should we step outside?  Once that is taken care of, I can move to give the student individual care (CPR: are you ok?)

I like starting off conversations with, "Are you angry at something I did today?" or "Are you upset at me?"  This does a number of things right off the bat.  First, it establishes that I'm not upset at the student. I am looking to get information. Second, it helps me figure out why the student is having some difficulty. Many times discipline problems are a result of something that happened minutes, hours, or days earlier.  By asking this one question I also am able to (usually) calm the student down both physically and emotionally.  This calms down the amygdala and opens up some more rational thinking. With the neural pathways more open, I can ask more mindful questions instead of rhetorical ones with negative connotation (why did you do that?) and get more insightful answers from the student. 

Coming from a perspective of a coach looking to improve a student, not a cop looking to write a ticket (detention slip), allows students to express their feelings and lets me offer solutions to help the student be more successful in similar situations in the future.

History is Many Things, but it is Generally NOT Glitter and Unicorns

I hope everyone (that is those that live and celebrate in the States) had a healthy and happy Thanksgiving!

As the leftovers were being cleaned up, I was reflecting on the year as well as the holiday itself - specifically how it is portrayed in schools.  My daughter is in elementary school and as such she did the typical Thanksgiving celebrations - turkey word searches and decorated pictures of pilgrims.  However, it made me think of something my colleague mentioned this month.

My middle school recently returned from a 4 day trip to Washington D.C.  It was a fantastic expedition during which we visited so many amazing and historical places.  Our students did an amazing job, pushing 13 hour days, over 10 miles of walking, and absorbing as much information as their minds would allow.

We were also part of a wreath laying ceremony at Arlington

The trip also showed our social studies teachers one of the problems with teaching history in American schools.  The focus on curriculum is not where it needs to be.  Students in 7th grade should have a solid understanding about the workings of the US government - the branches, the balance of power, the role of each branch.

She believes that elementary school students should not be directly taught 'history.'   History is NOT glitter and unicorns.  History is dirty.  Many of the topics are not appropriate for younger students due to their graphic nature.  Events are rarely black and white - good or bad.  Unfortunately elementary school students are not (nor should they be) exposed to this, and so they are raised with a strong cultural bias.

Ask younger grade school students about Columbus and they can tell you all sorts of "facts." He sailed the ocean blue in 1492, he found America, he proved the world was round, he traded with the Indians.  Then the pilgrims came, had a rough go of it, made friends with the Indians, who helped them survive before they vanished in the woodlands.

How we teach it

Unfortunately, many of those 'facts' are not true, and the ones that are are very much open to debate and perspective.  Elementary schools paint a pretty picture of colonization because, appropriately, the truth of how Columbus treated natives shouldn't be presented to 7 year old children.

And that is the problem.  We are teaching our younger children incorrect history, giving them part (specifically an anglo-american part) of an intricate story, and sending them on their way... and then middle or high school teachers have to be the 'bad guys' and 're-teach' students.  We have to explain that there have been multiple genocides, not just the one in Germany, and one occurred on the land on which we are currently teaching.  And when we bring this up, teachers are met with anger and disgust from both students and parents.

What isn't mentioned

The question she brought up was why not teach government and other objective topics in grade school.  Let's get students into middle school already knowing the different branches of government, the major historical documents, and how the Constitution is arrange.  Teach them about the electoral college.  Teach them about the different branches and their respective responsibilities.  Have them understand the difference between a democracy and a republic.

I certainly don't have a perfect answer - truth be told this is outside of my area of expertise.  But she did bring up some great points and I'm curious what other educators thing about this opinion.

Marathon Update - Goals, Parties, and Children - OH MY!

So much has happened since my last marathon training blog post.  To start, I am running about 20 miles per week with long runs of 10 miles.  That may seem like a lot (and it certainly is), but I still have over 350 miles of training to go before my marathon on October 18th.

First, I want to thank more than two dozen people that have donated to Nationwide Children's Hospital through my run.  I have reached both my original goal of $750 and my stretch goal of $1000.  These funds can buy 10 weeks worth of infant blood pressure cuffs, or four new mattresses for patients at the hospital.

I tell my students that when you reach a goal, you celebrate and then set a new goal.  That is what I have been doing.  Each time I reach my goal I celebrate by thanking those that helped, then set a new goal to reach.

Last week I also got to celebrate by attending RunFest - the kickoff to the Columbus half and full marathon.  It certainly was a party atmosphere with plenty of booths and displays!  It was at this event that we were also introduced to the 24 Children's Champions for the 2015 Marathon.

Each one an inspiration

My younger daughter joined me during this event and she was not disappointed either!  We received so much free stuff from so many vendors including a water bottle, shoe-wallets, girl scout cookies (not a cookie, a FULL BOX!), and a wicken shirt from Girls on the Run.  All of that free stuff got us pretty hungry.  Luckily they also had plenty of free food.

Alexa and I sat down at a table for lunch and began digging into the bratwurst and creme puff from the Schmidt's booth (an amazing local German Restaurant.)   A few minutes later another family sat down, and they were joined by a camera crew.

I asked if we needed to move and everyone said no, so we stayed and enjoyed our food.  We also listened to the interview.

Here is what I learned: I was sitting with Gunner - a 2 year old with a rare type of muscular dystrophy - and his family, an older brother and sister, and his mom and dad.  It was amazing to hear the parents talk about their child, their family, and what their son has gone through in his very young life.  You can see part of the interview on the RunFest 2015 kickoff video. (Highly recommended viewing!)

Can't wait to see him at mile 9!

Gunner is one of 24 children that will represent the Children's Champions.  These are the children, along with SO many others, that I chose to run this marathon.  These are the children and families that need the help.

When I started this journey I used the word perspective.  This is still true to me today.  If you are having a bad day, I strongly encourage you to read about the Children's Champions.  There is a short bio of each of them on the Nationwide Children's Website. It really will give you some perspective.

If you are able to donate, please click the link below.  After you click, select the orange 'give now' button on the right side of the page.  As a reminder all donations are 100% tax deductible.

Donate to Nationwide Children's Hospital

If you donate $25 or more  (I've been recommending the symbolic $26.20 amount) you get to pick a song for me to add to my playlist!  It is a way for you to 'run along' with me - when that song comes on I'll be thinking of you and how you helped someone in need.   A few of you that donated $25 or more still owe me songs!  Here is the current list of songs as selected by donors:

If you are not in a place to give - you can help by forwarding my message to someone you know can help.  As always, my goal is never to 'guilt' anyone in to giving - I know there are thousands of causes out there and nobody has the means to support them all!

Thank you for reading and all of the support!

My Latest Endeavor: Will You Help?

I'm proud to say that I will be running the full Columbus Marathon this October 18th. While that seems like a bit of time from now (about 28 weeks) I've already begun training, running about 17 miles per week with long runs of over 6 miles.

Wait... A marathon?  26.2 miles? At once? Why?  It's a pretty legit question, especially since I swore I'd never run another half after my 2013 run.  I mean I was never a distance runner - before 2012 I had never run more than 3 miles at once!

It's all about perspective.

Perspective is very important.  We've all had long days - hard days at work, tough days in a relationship. It's part of life.  Bree and I would go to dinner at a friend's house.  We'd talk about work, life, and the likes.

This friend was a doctor at Children's Hospital here in Columbus.  Specifically, she worked in hospice.

Hearing her stories really put my life in perspective.  While I would complain about an issue at school or Bree would talk about a client that no showed, she would talk about a 3-year-old child that is on her 25th session of chemotherapy.  She'd talk about having to work with the child and talk to the family.  And she'd explain how that was a good conversation compared to some of the others she had to have that day.

Perspective.

I ran the Columbus half marathon back in 2012.  I wore my Angel Mile shirt in honor of those that are no longer with us.  I will be wearing it again in 2015.

My goal is to raise at least $750 for the hospice program at Children's Hospital. Here are some of the people I am hoping to help:  Patient Stories

I've also decided to institute some incentives as a way to say thank you.

$10.00 :  periodic e-mail updates on my training
$26.20 : come run with me! suggest a song and I'll add it to my play list.  You'll be with me for that part of my run :)
$50.00 : 4x6 photo of the finishers medal along with a personal thank you note.



If you are unable to donate, you can help by forwarding my message (either this blog post or the link below) along to someone that you feel is in a place to give.  My goal is not to 'guilt' anyone into giving.  I know that circumstances are different for everyone.  I appreciate the time you take just to read this.

If you are able to make a financial donation, please click the link below.  After you click, select the orange "Give Now" button on the right.

Donate To Nationwide Children's Hospital

If you are not comfortable using an online system, click the link below for a mail in form.  Please e-mail me if you mail in a donation so that I can thank you personally!

Mail in donation form

All donations are 100% tax deductible

Thank you for reading and for any support you can give.